Friends in My Family?!

By Brianna C.

Today, our society scorns the family.  It laughs at it, breaks it down, and tramples it in the dust.  Yet, our family is so important.  Here, we find friends that will be with us for the rest of our lives.  It is our family that will be there in times of rejoicing, such as in marriage and childbirth, and who will be there in times of sorrow, and hardships. 

I have seven younger siblings (bro-13, bro-10, sis-9, bro-5, bro-3, bro-1 ½, and bro-1 week) and each of them is a joy.  I am so thankful that I’ve been raised in the family I’m in, so that I can know the true joys of siblings.  It’s so sad to see the many families raising children to hate each other.  We’ve known kids who seem to not even be able to bear playing a game with their siblings. (Even if it’s with other friends.  Besides, the idea of “sharing” friends is simply horrendous!  Imagine if your best friend was also your sister’s best friend!)  They are literally worst enemies.  My 13 year old brother is one of my best friends.  We love spending time together, and he often comes in my room when I’m working on projects late at night, just to talk.  My siblings and I also play games together, and go for walks and bike rides in the summer.

Also, parents and children no longer have the relationships of yester-year.  I met someone who won’t sit in the front seat of their vehicle because it’s “not cool” to sit with your parents.  I can’t imagine where I’d be without Mom.  She’s my very best friend, and is always there when I need her.  (And vice-versa).  We love each other’s company, and I’d rather be with her than anyone else.  Take time to develop a close relationship with your Mother- you will never, ever regret it!  Mom and I have always been close, but have grown especially so over the past couple of years.  It’s been wonderful, and it’s important to be able to go to your Mom with your questions as you step into beautiful womanhood.  (Or after you’ve stepped therein.)  My Dad also plays an important part in my life; I sure would hate to go through life without even knowing him.  That may sound like an over-statement, but it’s not anymore.  So many people don’t even know their families because they’re too caught up in their own life…their own school, their own games, their own friends, their own parties, etc.

This is not to say that it’s wrong to enjoy friends’ (outside the family) company, I definitely don’t think that!  I have godly, uplifting friends, and I don’t believe that is wrong, at all, and, in fact, believe it to be perfectly right if God’s placed them in your life.  But, we need to remember the treasures living right in our own home.  God has placed them in our life for a special reason.  It’s also our family that really knows us, and still tolerates us!   All of this is not to mention siblings often are good patience-teachers!  Don’t let the modern culture ruin the possibility of several wonderful relationships!

It’s not always easy to be good, faithful, friends with those in your family.  Brothers are often great at riding on your nerves, and knowing just when you’re at the end of your rope.  (Have you ever asked them what they think about you?  You can get a really honest opinion!)  I’m still learning, I still fail, but for all that, it’s still worth it!  Previously I’ve found it easy to compare siblings to friends (outside the family), “Well, she would never do that!” “It’s no wonder I don’t want to do this for you- So-and-so is much more selfless”, etc.  However, we’re not with our friends all that much.  Perhaps weekly, or maybe more or less.  Regardless, we’re never with them all the time, and it’s pretty easy to look (and act) rosy for a few hours a week.

In closing, I’d like to recommend a very wonderful book, Making Brothers and Sisters Best Friends, by Sarah, Stephen and Grace Mally.  It’s a wonderful book which really encouraged me in my in-home relationships.  It’s available from www.brothersandsisters.net   Enjoying growing closer to those nearest you!

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Featured in the February 2006 issue of With all of Thy Heart. (c) February 2006  With all of Thy Heart E-zine